high above..

I shall be the lush leaf at the tip of the tree,
waving and rustling in the air
being able to see the far horizons
confident of touching the skies someday,
whilst never shall i wither!

I shall not live just for the duty of it.

The incomprehensible imaginations one gets of how one's life should turn out to be are to be looked with awe and admiration. While the insecurities we feel of our immediate future and surroundings make us - the humans, to be no more than to be pitied at. Each opportunity we miss in life thinking of it's possible adverse effects, blowing it up to disproportionate volume, that it even smudges the tinkers of happiness that it might have yielded had we pursued it; makes us seem to be vain little creatures. Where did we learn to distinguish darkness from light and good from bad?

Now, we a group of animals, we who scrounge for wealth and health, we who created machinery and literature, set standards and try to segregate and shut everything we feel and see into labelled little boxes. How could we have dared to do such a deed? Isn't it true that everything deserves to be treated equally for its own uniqueness? There can never exist a line to part everything into one and another. It is futile to try and calibrate everything, for the final reading one might ever get is the absolute one - the infinity!

PS: yes! the usual cliched ending :)

O Captain! My Captain!

O Captain! My Captain!
So I want to scream
at the great gentleman who raised above
and told the truth to me.

I know him well of his crushes and sadness
for he is a simple man who accepts his madness

He told me to bother the pain caused by none
as he knew that the truth is only one.

When i cried and wailed
at the tempest of the evil harshness
at the cut-throat world causing bitterness
tumbling down to the spiraling hell,

There he stood patiently
waiting to absolve my sin of ignorance;

There he stood looking no likely to an angel
his dark skin and graying hair unlike any halo or wing.

Spoke my captain, that there is
nothing I shall not achieve
nothing I can grieve for
for when I set my heart, I can have it all!

No beauty I can be proud of
no wealth I can accumulate
for they all dwindle as time passes by.

Not a man's love so pure
not a friend's care so dear
for it is no better than peeling an onion to sheer.

Never a thirst of knowledge quenched
never an absolute power attained
for there is always something left as many as uncounted stars in the sky.

He said it all and said again
that there is only one truth I shall know
as long as the sands of time trickle
as long as there is a question unanswered,

It is for me to know that,
the truth behind everything is in the last,
the last of all - 'The Infinity'.

It is all infinite - laughter of happiness,
alluring pleasure, want of knowledge,
throat clutching sadness, unresistant power,
everlasting beauty, adventurous thrills
in the end all that is attained is worthless
compared to what is left to be attained yet.

My sin relieved, my conscience cleared,
O Captain! My Captain!
so shall I scream for you
for the infinite breath
each soul shall take
in the past, now and forever!

(As a mark of respect to Selvaganesan)
Priyadharshini Selvaganesan.

Law of photos.

This! i am writing because, my mind is just filled to its brim with Graduate course work and it is in desperate need of some dilutive. So here goes the vetti (for the meaning refer here. Quite a collection) analysis of the recently annoying yet interesting trend I've been observing off-late. PHOTOS!! PICS!!! Yes, the ones which are abundantly discharged in Facebook with innumerable album titles as equivalent to the number of friends one has. My postulates for not being interested in making a public statement of how do i look like are as follows -

• Law of piracy - However the Facebook may build brickwalled privacy protection policies, just like every other social networking sites, it too will have brilliant geeky hackers and spammers, who will make us quit or forget Facebook someday.
• Law of appa - When i collect and treasure my daughter's pictures even on her primary school ID cards, how can i be at peace on knowing that some random guy "liked" her picture on her Facebook wall.
• Law of equivalent exchange - If i put a profile picture and some 40+ people liked it, it indirectly means that i shall be entitled to like the pictures of those 40+ people however silly and mundane those pics might be, in order to sustain the number of likes for every rubbish post i update in future.
• Law of photoshop - If at all, i want to put a picture, i would have to crop, cut, contrast, brighten - do all the possible photoshop deeds to make it an outstanding profile picture, so that i'll be poured with likes and comments the instant i upload. This picture of mine would have only a 0.25 probability of having a resemblance of me (under predefined conditions such as tilted angle, properly slept non-black circle eyed face, etc) .
• Law of race - After the act of picture uploading, life becomes a race to keep up the rating for one self by keeping up the trend ( Such as - black & white photos, childhood photos, with a best friend photo, holiday trip photos, horizon BG photos and of many such likes). 

With all these delicacies added up to the fact that "if there occurs a picture perfect moment, my mind shall be more than glad to savor it better than any high resolution SLR camera, with the moment's purest essence, etched in my memory forever", I hope that i persist with my current perspective always in the future.

PS: Im just another hypocrite who justifies my laziness with abundant and random reasoning. So Free!! :P
Simple truth is - I just sense a feel of violation, when one's looks and likes are made public. After all wouldn't we like some privacy for ourselves?! :)

To write.

‘The first key to writing is to write, not to think!’ said the leading old actor in the film I just saw out of pure coincidence. The actor is Sean Connery. I’ve always liked him for his white hair, that gives this angelic appearance to him. When I write, I try to use some of the beautiful words that are not used in the mundane usage and end up searching in the wordweb for a sophisticated alter words using the thesaurus for a simple word. I’ve off late observed that the process of perfecting my writing in the nascent stage distracts my thought process while writing. And with this general analysis in my mind, when I came to see this one particular video clip from the movie “Finding Forrester”, I got inspired to write some bull shit and start enhancing my writing skills. Coming to think of it, I pity the people to whom I write this, as they get to read all these mumblings and ramblings. But I wouldn’t exactly empathize that feeling much because, it is of common knowledge that you actively chose to read it. So here I am penning my thoughts, while hearing this song, 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=fvwp&NR=1&v=7fXfOx1zA9Q

The colors of the rainbow, so pretty in the sky – they are much prettier when a kid points  it to you in a bus ride and you have nothing to do, but to join the kid, enjoy the moment and be happy for the beautiful dispersion of colors in the sky.

You know what I like the most? To be sitting alone comfortably, hearing a song, enjoying the music thoroughly, now and then really hearing the words, chanting them randomly.

What a wonderful world – Yes it absolutely is! Wide and clear sky, Planes flying in the distant far sometimes fooling the eye by appearing like a shining shooting star, Cold air breezing and making the chill being felt even in your deep gutter, sense of unboundedness of dreams and unquenchable pure confidence of the youth. Why wouldn’t the world be beautiful for me?! 

Masters – the enlightenment!

From the place I hail, doing a bachelorette has become like a pre-requiste high school studies and you just become another commoner with the basic knowledge of how to survive in this world. The choices for such young bachelors is to either find a job in a reputable company and work their way through the hierarchy of designations or write “n” number of entrance exams and enter into a - “The top 10 best college” (in truth- a middling average). And I, chose the later option! Simply because my Project Manager couldn’t comply with my petty whims like having breaks of 40 minutes other than the mundane lunch break & evening tea break.

And so started my phase of enlightenment in life! Am now at a less known part of USA (there was a friend who thought that Arizona was a part of Canada), studying a course which I think would be of no good to my career and trying the best at making edible enough food. Sometimes it occurs as a nightmare to think that the only knowledge I would have acquired during my Master’s would be the knowledge to cook for the world’s most damned male that I’m going to marry in future.

With all the uncertainness of what I’m doing at present and what the future holds for me, let us dwell deep into Theory of relativity and confute time dilation with the analysis of Doppler’s effect. I’m just kidding! I’ll give you an escapade from my intellections. Buhbye for now! Hope to be back with more random rantings..

out of the blue 2

Cont from out of the blue..
        Finally i did find a photocopying shop, gave my borrowed book for xerox and i was told to collect it after 2hrs. So i drew to house in the rain, maybe watched some tv show for 1.30 hrs & started back again. After reaching the shop, i found tat the guy in the shop didn't even start xeroxing (my contribution to english lang) & had to wait till he finished off with the one he was doing for the couple who were already present in the shop.   
        Here is where the interesting thing happens. U see, the couple came with their kid, a girl of 4 yrs old maybe. There were 2 seats in the waiting area. The man was looking over his documents getting xeroxed (another contribution), while the wife occupied one of the seats and i used the other one left. The kid was lounging near her mother, trying to best work her immature brain, by meddling with her fingers forming shapes. I was bored & trying to work my brain at the best too, yet afraid to try out things like the kid did. So, i made faces to the kid (not the scary ones, don't get afraid) in an attempt to grab her attention. Eventually, she succumbed and started laughing. Then we introduced ourselves to each other & i started inquiring her likes. She was enthused & described everything in detail (kids use their whole body to describe something usually- better body language, we could say). Her interest turned onto my mobile later & it was with great effort from her mother tat i was able to get it back from her . I got a call by then & so went out to attend to it. When i returned, the little girl was occupying my seat. On seeing me, she asked her mom to get up, so that i can have the seat beside her. It was thoroughly embarrassing for the girl's mother to observe her disloyalty. I kinda managed the situation saying tat i'll be able to play better with her, if she sits on my lap, for which she agreed. Then we played with all the things tat i had in my purse and passed another half an hour. By then, the kid got much friendly with me & spoke to me like i was her friend for years.
        The kids father, returned with his work being completed. Tats when the most unusual thing happened. The kid got down, put on her slippers, called her mother, took my helmet & called me too (in a matter of fact tone). The couple where drenched in embarrassment of the way she called me, like as if I've been living with her. Again, in order to be courteous, i had to do lots of false promises tat i'll surely come to her house some other day, but not now as i still have my book to be xeroxed yet. She said tat, being tat the case, she'll wait and come with me, whilst her parents who got their xerox work done can leave now & wore my helmet on her head diligently and gave an adorable stare. I had to reason out to her that i dont know the way to her house & somehow finally got my helmet back from her. I promised her that i'll buy lots of chocolates & come along with my parents to her house. She then gave in & started off with the promise tat i'll go and see her definitely. A bit of sadness was visible on her face, maybe she realized the impracticality of my visit to her house. I bid her farewell with a final note, tat she should never go out with a stranger or ask a stranger to come to her house hereafter. Her parents left with an acknowledging smile of the choice of friend their kid made.
        Though i knew tat the final note i gave to her was making me loose my cool to tat kid, i still had to tell her tat as i felt responsible in some way for the way she is going to be molded according to the world she lives in and i wanted her to be safe in this world too. I could say tat the friendship of less than an hour, i made tat day, to be the best one i could ever make in my whole life! Innocence is beauty!